I’m told in certain circumstances in tournament soccer play, it can be advantageous to lose a game so that you play a weaker opponent next, and a stronger opponent plays a stronger opponent, possibly losing, thus allowing you to play the weaker team and win. I suppose it is possible that under certain circumstances, a tie would be advantageous, and possibly a 0 – 0 tie. That supposition is a required backdrop for this poem.
The hour appears to draw near
When the game clock sings
And the crowd will cheer;
And I will leave the field a victor,
Despite the score being zeros.
Not by my being a hero, no.
By: my fear of the unknown,
the strength side of my weakness,
my ultimatum uncommunicated, unfulfilled.
All shots on the goal missed;
Some deflected, others poorly timed,
And some badly aimed.
And though time remains,
I’m like a quarterback
Kneeling after the snap;
I must keep the ball
Centered mid-field
And watch the clock expire,
For fear a warning dream
Becomes my future,
And I don’t wake with a scream.
I must watch the clock run out,
From self-respect on a two-way street,
Where what’s good for the goose—
You may think I’ll be tired,
Running around in circles
Trying to keep the ball away;
But the only circles I’ll be running
Will be the ones in my mind.
There’s but two on the field:
The goalie and me.
Guarding the goal, the goalie won’t yield;
Never engaging me to take the ball.
I cannot enter the goal box,
So I set the ball at mid-field,
And slowly back away;
Still, the goalie won’t engage.
© 2014 H.K. Longmore
Vain Imaginations, Reinterpreted
Booksreadr scrapes the web and creates a digital library from whatever PDFs and probably other ebook formats it finds. They grabbed my book and added it to their library. (I sincerely hope it was only the 20% free version, but I’m not willing to give them my credit card information to validate my address so they can give me a free account, as I’m skeptical of them and their product, based on how little contact information they give.) But they apparently didn’t like my summary. It appears they took my description written in native English, machine
translated it to some other language, and translated it back to English, making for a rather amusing though ridiculous rendering of the description. From http://booksreadr.org/ebook/vain-imaginations on 26 November 2014:
My actual description from https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/481054:
There was a famous attempt at machine translation in the early days of artificial intelligence (well, famous in the field of AI). The phrase “The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak” was translated to Russian then back to English. The result? “The vodka is good but the meat is rotten.” So this Seattle, WA company (at least, that’s where their terms of use agreement says court cases will go; the domain is registered in Panama) is doing about as good as circa-1960’s MT. Way to go.
P.S. If anyone has a booksreadr account and can tell me how legit they are, I’d be interested to know.
P.P.S. Whether the actual phrase “The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak” was put through an MT system in the late 1950’s or early 1960’s is a bit apocryphal. But there were MT systems that translated from English to Russian, and from Russian to English, which made similar messes of idiomatic speech.
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